Stresses

She had asked me to get her a vibrator. Why I was blessed with this task I don't know but whatever reason she had it was my task and I must get her a good one.
But how am I supposed to know what is a good one, are there brand names? What if I get her the wrong one and it shorts out... while in her... yipes!!
There must be some logical process to it thought, I mean usually the more expensive the better, right, ok so I will just get her one that's of medium expense.
But what size? Would she want the jumbo goliath vibrotron 8000? Or a more modest one she could fit in her pocket? What about width the girth, the girth of the damn thing!! What if I get one that is too wide and she can't get it in or it hurts her?
Must stay calm, must relax it’s not the end of the world, Armageddon will not come because I got the wrong vibe for my girlfriend. Crap the store is coming up soon and I still have no clue.
I’ve never been to one of these stores; will they look at me funny if I buy a vibrator? This is worse than the time she sent me to buy her some lingerie, I have no instructions I am not ready to do this!, but if I go back without one she will think I’m a wuss and might even break up with me.
Why, why WHY did she ask me to do this? Guys aren't good with this, we think the only toy a woman needs is in our pants, oh my god, I must be inadequate she needs to resort to electronic stimulation to stay happy.
OR what if she wants to use it on me; I knew I shouldn't have asked her if she would like to do anal. If that's the case maybe I should stick with a smaller one, but then if it is for her she might not like it.
Maybe if I beat my head against the door for a while some nice person will help me, yeah help me to the loony bin. She’s so nice most of the time how did she ever come up with this task for me?
Ok I just gotta walk through that door, that's all, the answer will present itself. Ok here I go...
OH MY GOD!!
There are so many!! I'm verging on a nervous breakdown here! Which one to choose, the 8' slimline vibemaster, the 5' pussrouter with detachable spikes, the 15' monster cock?? Vibrator or dong? Realistic or designed for comfort.
Tempted to just assume the fetal position in a corner and wait for it all to go away. I bravely browsed, looking at first one row and then the next hoping to find something that stood apart from the rest.
Hmmm this one has adjustable speeds, this one doesn't but it has a bigger motor this one has no motor but it has realistic testicles dangling, they even feel real... I was this close from feeling another man's testicles, sigh what power women have over us to make us do such things.
There it is the ultimate vibrator the silver bullet, 8' long polished ummmm chrome or something, but its called the silver bullet, adjustable speed powerful and it even looks good, hell of a lot nicer than that ball thing back a few aisles. It’s perfect she'll love it... maybe... maybe she'd like the ball thing, maybe she wants the pussrouter, I just don't know.
In retrospect falling to the floor with a vibrator in each hand and then banging my head against the floor until the paramedics came wasn't such a good idea. But when I regained consciousness there at the foot of my hospital bed in a box all nicely wrapped, lay the silver bullet and I knew that I had gotten the right thing, even though it did disturb me that I didn't remember anything after collapsing in the store.
My girlfriend came to see me today, the nice doctors allowed me to have visitors today although I had to stay behind the protective glass. She said she was very happy with the silver bullet and she was glad she sent me for it. I can't say I liked the look on her face when she said that I will enjoy it to.
Oh well I survived it and now well she could have at least taken it out of the box before she used it on me, but it is over and we are happy, and that's what really matters, isn't it?

Tempted to just assume the fetal position in a corner and wait for it all to go away. I bravely browsed, looking at first one row and then the next hoping to find something that stood apart from the rest.
Hmmm this one has adjustable speeds, this one doesn't but it has a bigger motor this one has no motor but it has realistic testicles dangling, they even feel real... I was this close from feeling another man's testicles, sigh what power women have over us to make us do such things.
There it is the ultimate vibrator the silver bullet, 8' long polished ummmm chrome or something, but its called the silver bullet, adjustable speed powerful and it even looks good, hell of a lot nicer than that ball thing back a few aisles. It’s perfect she'll love it... maybe... maybe she'd like the ball thing, maybe she wants the pussrouter, I just don't know.
In retrospect falling to the floor with a vibrator in each hand and then banging my head against the floor until the paramedics came wasn't such a good idea. But when I regained consciousness there at the foot of my hospital bed in a box all nicely wrapped, lay the silver bullet and I knew that I had gotten the right thing, even though it did disturb me that I didn't remember anything after collapsing in the store.

A Quickie

I'm watching you in a bar. The guy you're with. Something’s just not right. It doesn't add up. He looks like a nerd with his glasses and tank top. And you with the long hair, great tits and a fine arse. Your wasted on this guy and you and I both know it.
I watch you as you chat. There's no sparkle in your eyes. Your date raises from the table. "would you like another drink?". You smile, you say yes and you play with your empty glass. You catch my gaze. You look at me, and your actions change. A slight shift in sitting position, a flick of the hair, a quick glance to your date. An uncomfortable smile.
Your date returns with your drink, suggest that you go and play pool. The table is out the back, away from me. You glance at me as you leave. I look you up and down. The silk blouse, no bra, short skirt and long leather boots.
I get up and walk over to the bar, pull up a stool and order more refreshment. You think I can't see you. The little adjustments you make to the skirt and blouse thinking I may come in. A CCTV screen sits behind the bar, its picture trained on the pool table.
I watch you bend over to break the balls. It’s obviously not the first time you've played this game. I picture myself fucking you hard from behind, playing with your ample tits, tweaking your nipples. Your date takes his shot, but your not watching him. Your look around the room, you see the camera. Your gut feeling tells you I'm watching. You look at the date, he's busy trying to impress you. Staring right at the lens you suck the tip of two of your finger. You run them up and down your neck. The date misses a shot. He tells you he’ll be back in five minutes.
I make my way to the pool room. Your playing with the balls on the table and don't notice me come in. I shut the door and turn the key. You look up at me. You turn and face me, holding the cue as if it were a weapon. What u gonna do with that, hey? I push you against the wall, take your face in hand, squeeze and kiss you hard. You respond, I tear your blouse open. You don't care anymore, your lost in the moment. I squezee your breasts. Your nipples are so firm. I place my thigh between your legs and start kneading your crotch. Your pussy is soaking wet. You moan but then try to pull away. Guilt is catching up with you. I grab your arse. I hitch up your skirt. Your still fighting me off, but there's no effort there. I go down on my knees, lift your leg over my shoulder and push my face into your pussy sucking on your clit. You taste sooo good. I tease you by spelling my name out with my tongue. Your biting your lip as you push yourself harder into my face. "FUCK ME HARD, FUCK ME NOW" you demand. I stand up, and you frantically tug at my belt and undo my jeans. My cock is rock solid and glad to be released from the constraints of my jeans. You wrap your legs around my waist, the cool leather of your boots rubbing against my arse, and hold on tight. I walk you to the table and pin you down. I thrust into you, your wet pussy making entrance easy. I lean over you as I push. You catch a poolball from beside you. You hit me on the arm with it, 'faster, faster' you cry. I’m on the edge of climax. I lift the cue from beside the table and place it across your mouth. "bite on this' as I go for the final push. Hard and fast I push, looking into your eyes as I do. You look like its been years since you were fucked like this. As I explode deep inside you, I grab your hair and pull you close to me. We’re both panting heavily know. The sweat trickles down my brow. I tear a piece of your blouse off to wipe myself clean. You protest that I'm leaving.I pull your head back, kiss you hard one last time so you can taste your juices and tell you to have your boyfriend finish you off. I walk back to the bar to finish my pint, and the barman gives me a sly wink.

I'm watching you in a bar. The guy you're with. Something’s just not right. It doesn't add up. He looks like a nerd with his glasses and tank top. And you with the long hair, great tits and a fine arse. Your wasted on this guy and you and I both know it.

The Package

It arrived in the mail today. It feels a hundred years have gone by since then. My chest is tight and my mind is reeling.
Coming up the walk I grabbed the mail and went inside. A couple of bills, junk mail, and a plain package with my name on it. I throw it on the counter in the kitchen. I get myself a drink and open the package. "What the fuck?" I murmur to myself, "a video tape."
Heading into the family room I pop the tape into the VCR. I sit down and hit play. The picture is fuzzy at first but then it clears up.
A large group of people appears. Most are nude and getting it on. Who sent me a porno? I don't know but I watch the TV screen.
The camera zooms in on the honey in the center of a cluster of men. She's sucking dick like there's no tomorrow. The men are lined up and she's blowing each one. They paw at her body as she shuffles down the line. Her tits are squeezed and her nipples pinched. Hands and fingers probe her pussy and ass.
Suddenly a voice hollers, "Hey sweetie smile for the camera." She does smile with her mouth full of cock. My stomach knots up and I flinch forward. With my bulging eyes I see her.
MY WIFE! On her knees blowing this line of men. Hands reach out and pull her down the line. She clamps down on the next cock. With a fistful of hair he forces his cock down her throat.
His hips buck as he shoots his load down my wife's throat. She greedily takes it all. Laughter all around. Hands smack her ass.
She sits back on her ass and two cocks are thrust at her. She sucks one and then the other. "Give her two for one" someone shouts. "Open wide cum queen" she's told as both cocks are shoved into her mouth.
Maggie, my wife, sucks on these cocks in her mouth. Her mouth is stretched by the size of the meat stuffed between her lips.
One guy yanks his cock from her mouth. Jerking off he shoots his load onto her face and hair. The other cock in her mouth bulges and then one more load of cum gushes down her throat.
Wiping the cum from her eyes she crawls to the next guy. She kneels before him and begins sucking his dick. "She needs to be fucked. Let's stretch her cunt hole" I hear from the tape.
Another man. How many men? I have lost count. He reaches between her legs and spreads her pussy lips. His cock easily glides into her slick snatch. Her pussy is sloppy wet now.
Using her for his pleasure he fucks away. His body smacks off her ass. His thrusts push Maggie forward and she is forced to deep throat the cock in her mouth.
Someone is underneath her licking her nipples. Her hand finds his dick and jerks him off. MY WIFE is fucking three guys. Feeling weak I continue to watch the TV screen.
"Here it comes slut!" the backdoor man shouts and pulls out of her pussy. He sprays his cum down her back and ass cheeks. Her nipple licker crawls from beneath her and mounts her from behind.
"Time to drink some more cum" she is told. Her mouth clamps down on his cock and she drinks all he has to offer. Maggie lays her head on the sofa. Her tits are flopping back and forth from the pounding she is getting. This guys thrusts are slower and deeper. He is taking his time.
MY WIFE sucking and fucking a roomful of men. Is this a sexual twilight zone? And still I watch another guy pull out of Maggie's pussy and spray his seed all over her.
Sitting up and smiling Maggie looks at the camera. " This tape is for your veiwing only. My husband will never see this, right?" she asks the cameraman.
I sit there feeling like my world has ended. The image of Maggie covered in cum will never go away. The tape goes fuzzy and so do I.
When Maggie gets home from work she finds all her belongings on the porch waiting for her. She picks up the note and reads it. "Maggie, You are no longer welcome in my house. I have contacted an attorney to get the divorce proceedings started. How could you? Do that? Get your stuff and LEAVE."
I watch her throw her belongings in her car. Maggie is weeping as she drives away. In the end you really don't know a person that well at all.
The End

It arrived in the mail today. It feels a hundred years have gone by since then. My chest is tight and my mind is reeling.
Coming up the walk I grabbed the mail and went inside. A couple of bills, junk mail, and a plain package with my name on it. I throw it on the counter in the kitchen. I get myself a drink and open the package. "What the fuck?" I murmur to myself, "a video tape."
Heading into the family room I pop the tape into the VCR. I sit down and hit play. The picture is fuzzy at first but then it clears up.

Fun in the Tub

It was late when I decided to visit you at the station. You had to pull a twelve- hour shift, so I thought I would go over and surprise you. Plus I had some interesting fantasies that I thought I might be able to convince you to act out with me. When I got there the guys told me that I could find you downstairs in the hot tub. I peek around the door to see if you were alone before I entered. With your back facing me, you never heard me walk in and slip out of the long jacket I wore over my naked body. I tip toed over to you and sat on the edge of the tub. Leaning over I gently sucked on your ear, whispering the sexy stuff that I would like to do with you, as my hands ran over the front of your chest. You jumped a mile, not realizing whom it was. Turning around, you find me standing in absolutely nothing, I saw you catch your breath, and I could also tell from the front of your shorts that you were happy to see me.
"Baby, why don't you join me in the tub? From where I am standing you look a little chilly. Let me warm you up." I looked up at you and coyly turned away, as if I was going to leave. I heard you get out of the hot tub and chase after me. Of course you are much faster than I am, I didn't get very far, when I felt your arms go around my waist. I gave a little screech and tried to get away from you, that is until I felt your tongue caress that sensitive spot on my neck right below my ear. Sighing I leaned back against you to enjoy more of this sensuous feeling, you could tell that I was becoming very hot, just from your mouth. Just when I thought it couldn't get any better I felt your hand slide down my chest and stomach, resting right above the spot I was dying for you to explore and play with.
Becoming impatient I pressed myself closer to the lower half of your body, needing to feel your hardness against me. I began to whimper as you bit my neck and told me to be patient. Not liking that response I reached behind me and began to rub the inside of your thigh. My fingers slowly inched their way up until I had your hardness in the palm of my hand. With my fingers wrapped snuggly around you, I began to slide my hand up and down the length of you. I took full advantage of the fact that you were becoming extremely excited and turned my body towards yours. Facing you I leaned up and placed a soft kiss on your mouth. The moment I felt your tongue slide against mine, I pulled away. It was my turn to tell you to be patient. I than began to kiss the side of your neck, lightly nibbling my way down your chest. When I reached your nipples I could feel your body tense up with pleasure. With my hand still caressing your hardness, I ran my tongue lightly over your nipple, gently blowing cool air over it. The feel of you growing harder in my hand made me want more. I wanted to feel all of you fitting nice and snuggly in my warm wet mouth.
Leaning down to kneel in front of you, I kiss the top of your head, letting you feel how hot and wet my mouth is for you. Grabbing the back of my head you push me forward so that I can take more of you. Shaking my head, I pull away. We are going to do this my way. It's my turn to tease you since you are usually the one in control. Looking in to your eyes I trail my tongue up the underside of your hardness until the tip of you was in my mouth. Taking your hand I place it on you, so that we can both please you. The thought of you touching yourself while my mouth was moving over you was very erotic. My mouth matched the rhythm of your hand. I began to suck on the tip of your hardness as your hand slid up and down the length of you. Thus proving to be very exciting for both of us, I slide my hand down and began to caress my clit in a slow motion. I could tell you were getting ready to finish, so I moved in between your legs and took your balls in to my mouth. I moved them around with my tongue as I sucked gently on them.
Not wanting to finish yet, you push me down on to the edge of the hot tub and laid down in between my legs. Smiling up at me, you placed your lips over mine and we shared a deep kiss. As your tongue slid deeper into my mouth I felt your fingers caress the inside of me. Needing more, I placed my hand on my clit and began to rub with a little more force than earlier. I was so wrapped up in the pleasure from both of our hands I didn't notice that you stopped kissing me until I felt your tongue on my clit. Arching up towards you, I pushed your head closer. I needed to feel your tongue move over me. Knowing just how I like it, you licked and sucked until you felt the juices from my orgasm on the tip of your tongue.
Moving into the hot tub, you sat on the step and pulled me over towards you so that I was straddling your lap. Needing no other encouragement I positioned you, so that I could slide you into me. As I placed my hand around your hardness I caught a movement out of the corner of my eye. I looked up to find Jeff standing by the door watching us. Keeping eye contact with him I lowered myself on to you and began a slow rhythm that suited the both of us. Smiling at Jeff I leaned over and began to nibble on the lobe of your ear. Jeff smiled back and that's when I saw his hand was inside his uniform. I was becoming extremely excited from both being watched and watching somebody else touch himself because of our lovemaking. I began to pick up the pace, sliding you in and out of my body, tightening my muscles al around you as you entered me over and over again. The feel of you inside me drove me wild.
Your warmth and size was driving me wild with desire. I could tell by the look in Jeff's eyes that he was about to finish and from the way your body was tensing up I knew that you were pretty close your self. Leaning back I began to rub my nipples, as I moved my body faster and faster over you. The rhythm was becoming hard and rough, no longer a set pace. The only thing we were looking for was to finish the torment. Not being able to take anymore of the excitement I wrapped my arms around your neck and gave in to the passion that was racking through my body. The moment I began to cry out my passion, I saw Jeff's eyes cover over from his own passion. Resting my head on your shoulder for a moment to catch my breath, I heard you say that was the best surprise you have ever had. Looking up to answer you I noticed that Jeff was no longer standing there, I thought about asking if you knew he was there, but than decided against it. We'll save that for another day and another story.

Resting my head on your shoulder for a moment to catch my breath, I heard you say that was the best surprise you have ever had. Looking up to answer you I noticed that Jeff was no longer standing there, I thought about asking if you knew he was there, but than decided against it. We'll save that for another day and another story.

Demmm

Blessing or Curse?

I've got a problem, most men wouldn't consider it a problem, but I do. Many men think that size matters, it does to some extent, but just like how breasts can get too big, your penis can too. I was "blessed" with a 15" cock that is as big around as Pringles can.
I know what you're thinking, "Wow, he has a giant cock, he must get lots of women!" This isn't true, I have the same problems that all men have. I still have to go out to clubs, and it's not as if women can just see me and tell that I have a large cock and want to sleep with me. I still have to work up the courage to talk to a girl. I try to spark a conversation, making it seem like I am not just trying to get into her pants, although most of the time that can't physically happen.
Usually when I tell a woman about my size, they laugh and think that I am joking. Then while out on the dance floor, we start grinding against each other, they feel my groin, and the woman always has this shocked look on her face, and insists we go back to her place. We get there, and begin kissing and making out, and then she'll invite me upstairs, with that look that women get when they are in total lust, and all they want is sex. We undress, and she sees it for the first time, and then the butterflies kick in. Women aren't used to seeing my cock, and are surprised that a cock is that big, it intimidates them. The get this look in their eye, trying to think about what they are going to do with it, they always try a few positions, but they won't work. Then she gets this dejected look on her face, and says "Maybe it would be better if you left." Pretty Harsh eh?
Most women think they can handle my cock, they're all wrong, sadly. Have you ever thought about the average size of a woman's mouth, nonetheless her pussy? Most women can barely fit their mouth around my cock, much less give me a decent blowjob. Women always try and eventually fail, and give up, never to be heard from again. The number of women I have been with who have actually been able to get their mouth around it is maybe 10, maybe. It's just not physically possible for them, even the women who can fit it in their mouth, usually gag, and one of them ended up throwing up on me, which killed the mood.
Actually have sexual intercourse with a woman is almost impossible, a woman's vagina just wasn't built to handle my massive cock. I usually can barely fit it in, with no thrusting at all, and by then she can't bare the pain anymore and makes me stop. It's sad, women always try, but always inevitably fail. I have only been able to have intercourse with one girl, and that was part of a gang-bang. I was about 5th in line, so she was already opened up for me, so I actually was able to fit enough of it in. I know what you women are thinking, "maybe he should just try harder with foreplay to get them open more."
Believe me I have tried, I attempted to get one girl wet by eating her pussy for 30 minutes straight (she came at least that many times too) so she was as wet as she was going to get. So I tried to stick it in to get some relief, but to no avail, I still couldn't only fit about 8 inches of it in, that's barely more than half, before she was in too much pain to bear. The only way I can ever get off is when I get a hand job or get tit-fucked, but with that the woman needs large breasts. Of course, some women think that it is absurd that I even ask that. However, most of the women who have performed it seem to enjoy it a lot.
When I do cum, however, the woman seems entranced by it, they have never seen anything that size, and watch intently, almost mesmerized, at it. Then I ejaculate (and with my cock it goes a pretty good distance, and is quite accurate when I aim) it shoots at them, and just doesn't stop, I keep shooting for 1-2 minutes afterward. So men, those of you who think you are inadequate, just think, at least I can still fit it in and pleasure a woman, because some men can't.

Usually when I tell a woman about my size, they laugh and think that I am joking. Then while out on the dance floor, we start grinding against each other, they feel my groin, and the woman always has this shocked look on her face, and insists we go back to her place. We get there, and begin kissing and making out, and then she'll invite me upstairs, with that look that women get when they are in total lust, and all they want is sex. We undress, and she sees it for the first time, and then the butterflies kick in. Women aren't used to seeing my cock, and are surprised that a cock is that big, it intimidates them. The get this look in their eye, trying to think about what they are going to do with it, they always try a few positions, but they won't work. Then she gets this dejected look on her face, and says "Maybe it would be better if you left." Pretty Harsh eh?
Most women think they can handle my cock, they're all wrong, sadly. Have you ever thought about the average size of a woman's mouth, nonetheless her pussy? Most women can barely fit their mouth around my cock, much less give me a decent blowjob. Women always try and eventually fail, and give up, never to be heard from again. The number of women I have been with who have actually been able to get their mouth around it is maybe 10, maybe. It's just not physically possible for them, even the women who can fit it in their mouth, usually gag, and one of them ended up throwing up on me, which killed the mood.
Actually have sexual intercourse with a woman is almost impossible, a woman's vagina just wasn't built to handle my massive cock. I usually can barely fit it in, with no thrusting at all, and by then she can't bare the pain anymore and makes me stop. It's sad, women always try, but always inevitably fail. I have only been able to have intercourse with one girl, and that was part of a gang-bang. I was about 5th in line, so she was already opened up for me, so I actually was able to fit enough of it in. I know what you women are thinking, "maybe he should just try harder with foreplay to get them open more."

lawsonhr

Bloody Chin

Now, I love Torch, she's my best friend, my lover, the only girl on this Earth who completes me... which means anything funny, or fun, that we do, ends up here.
This is the former, beware, for those of a weak stomach, it's a bit much, (men especially).
To begin, Tori's (her real name is Victoria, everyone calls her Tori, I call her Torch) parents are psychotic. They hate men, and for good reason, their daughter is beautiful, smart, loving, and an amazing artist. I am blessed beyond words.
With the sweet comes the sour, or in this case, iron tasting, she comes over rarely, but when she does we're balls out passion, embracing, removing clothes, kissing, caressing, etc. So, September 30th, 2003, was no exception.
This was out 5th time together, (since out proclamation of love) most of our romance is online, but real, she only lives a few miles away, but is only able to sneak out rarely.
So we embrace, as always, and I feel my love and essence in her, so we kiss madly, as per usual, and she says, "We only have ten minutes," and looks to me to make a decision, my pleasure, or hers.
To pause this: This decision would take a man an hour, but I make it simply, being an idiosyncratic male, hers.
She undoes her pants and slides them off, sitting back on the bed, I take position and rub her through her panties, a cute gray, the little triangles connected by strings pair. I pull those off seeing her partially shaved, partially trimmed lips, and waste no time.
Seeing as how my mother is in the next room, I throw her a pillow, to muffle the moans (which will be abundant in a moment) so I slide my fingers into her, she's warm and moist, most likely from thinking about what we would do today, like I was.
So she enjoys this, but it's not enough, it'll make her have an orgasm, sure, but not one to send her mind in the gutter, and if it's not the best I can do, it's not enough, so I lean in and spread her lips and finger her more while sucking on her clit.
The moans then sprang, so I stopped, which annoyed her, but I reminded her of my mother, and she understood.
I continued for a good 8 minutes (we had 10 in total so, she had many orgasms, being very sensitive, which I enjoy, because that way, she's never left unsatisfied. I stop and rub her legs a bit, to help the muscles, and pull her onto my lap.
Second pause: Now, I know that since I'm clothed, there is no danger of anything, and I figured, a little harmless grinding to tease her before she had to live was fine, right?
We did this, her kissing me madly, and moaning, and me feeling safe in her arms as we rock gently back and forth gently. Two minutes pass, she sits up to leave, and I spread her legs again and lick her, seeking her clit, then plunging my tongue into her hole. This is fine, but it tastes strange, so I back up, and she sees blood on my chin.
My hand had no, I repeat, no blood on it. Her hymen was intact still Yay for abstinence! But... the problem was, why she was bleeding. I looked to my lap, and in a large oval pattern on my bright orange pants I spotted a large red mark.
Her period began as soon as she sat on my lap. I wiped my chin clean and laughed, it was really terribly funny.
I had delved my tongue into an open wound of sorts, and hadn't noticed it until I had done so. Now, I love her dearly, and she is a great girl, but... in all truth? I was nearly sick thinking that I had gotten a mouthful of blood and clot.
So, she got dressed, with a pad, and I laughed her out to her truck as she drove off home. I told her I'd write this, on the basis of... it's too good to not share, but I don't want word getting out to her parents, so, in the spirit of humor, read and enjoy.
As for me? I'm off, to do the laundry... my blanket and pillow, and pants, and even shirt, have large red stains on them.
Hope you enjoy this as much as my kids will, once I have them, and they grow up old enough to understand this.

Her period began as soon as she sat on my lap. I wiped my chin clean and laughed, it was really terribly funny.
I had delved my tongue into an open wound of sorts, and hadn't noticed it until I had done so. Now, I love her dearly, and she is a great girl, but... in all truth? I was nearly sick thinking that I had gotten a mouthful of blood and clot.
So, she got dressed, with a pad, and I laughed her out to her truck as she drove off home. I told her I'd write this, on the basis of... it's too good to not share, but I don't want word getting out to her parents, so, in the spirit of humor, read and enjoy.
As for me? I'm off, to do the laundry... my blanket and pillow, and pants, and even shirt, have large red stains on them.